Monday, February 25, 2008

An Open Letter To Jimmy Kimmel...

Dear James:

It hasn't been a secret that among late night hosts, I have always thought of you as the Renee Zellwegger (sweaty, puffy, and quite possibly a cokewhore), so when you and Sarah Silverman hooked up, I thought you deserved each other because I didn't find either of you funny, but you both seemed to get a great kick out of yourself. Then her video with Matt Damon happened, and I softened a bit to her in a way I thought I would have when she did School of Rock, and I began to think she was too good for you.

When it was announced you would be doing a retaliation video, I was convinced it was going to be just some lame copycat. The fact that there was all of this hype around it in the media, and we knew who the "mistress" would be only confirmed my suspicions. Then we had to wait. And wait and wait and wait. Surely debuting it on Oscar night was a publicity stunt-- one last quest for those Sweeps ratings-- but would anyone care by then?

I admit I didn't tune in. I never watch your show. But I did log onto BWE this morning (as I always do) to watch it. And I can't believe I'm saying this, but it was worth the wait. From the set changes to the costume changes to the two awesome book-ended cameos, to the weird Dickie Roberts-like choir... it was just awesome.

So Jimmy, I apologize for prematurely judging you (though I have a tendency to do that); you really are better than the "I just don't give a sh*t" attitude you exude. And if I see you at this year's San Gennaro, I won't snub you the way I have in years past. I may even ask you to stop and take a picture with my book. Consider yourself flattered.


DC said...

Josh Groban is amazing.

Kate, Dating in LA said...

This cracked me up. Who knew Harrison Ford had that kind of wicked sense of humor!