Thursday, June 12, 2008

If You're Reading This, You're Either A Woman Or Gay...

I know, I know; I said I would live blog, but from the opening (musical!) number, I was hooked and decided I wanted to just concentrate on watching the snark unfold without worrying about coming up with something clever of my own to inject into the night.

2008 A-List Awards - Vocal Stylings Of Kathy Griffin
Hopefully soon the full version will be available for downloading.

However, as the minutes ticked off into a very odd hour and a half run time, there were certain things that just screamed begging for my commentary, least of all the fact that the winners were really announced on the red carpet special, when the at-home audience got their first glimpse (well, aside from Getty Images, that is) at who showed up. It became clear that whoever and however these “winners” were chosen, an important criteria was that they appear on a Bravo program. Though they were up against stars on other networks, and in often cases on more renowned or at least publicized programs, the Bravo audience is a specific one, and a loyal one, and some Power That Be decided they would expect nothing less than to celebrate their own. Well, yeah; as the artsy, quirky kid in school, Bravo knows enough to stick with its own-- those who understand and embrace it.

And that they did: the presenters and audience alike were a cornucopia of Bravo shows past and present, from the very recognizable Jay McCarroll (Project Runway’s first winner) to the “Huh? Who the hell is that?” Tabitha of Shear Genius. Bravo managed to plug its own programming within the awards ceremony, not just through the faces in the crowd or commercials but through special pre-recorded segments, such as ex-Project Runway contestants creating original gowns for other Bravo stars to wear during a special, one-night only fashion show. Each unique design would then be auctioned off for charity… or perhaps to raise the money to bring Project Runway back to Bravo. See? That's just the kind of "aw, burn" humor that would have killed at the A-List Awards!

But for Anna Sui, who memorized an emotional acceptance speech, no one else seemed to take the show too seriously, which was consistent with the tongue-in-cheek nature of the network on a nightly basis. The Real Housewives of rival coasts poked fun at each other on stage for “living in California but sixty-five miles from the beach” and because they “talk funny;” the girl who introduced Anna Sui's category didn't seem like she had ever heard any of the words on the teleprompter before; Tom Colicchio of Top Chef competed in a commercial break-length quick fire challenge; a handful of comediennes snuck in mini stand-up routines; there was an actual award for "Best Ass," and it referred to posteriors (complete with photos!); the "In Memorandum" segment was not actual dead people but just a "Dead To Kathy Griffin" segment and was mostly just a photo of Ryan Seacrest (oh and Dr. Phil, the Scientology center, and of course W.); Simon Dooney practically rolled his eyes while reading his copy off the teleprompter but instead just delivered his lines in a saucy, sassy accent; Kathy actually did roll her eyes at Tila Tequila…

Oh, and speaking of our gracious host, she ate food off the floor, allowed cameras with her backstage while she took part in a ninety-second wardrobe change, and then of course performed the beginnings of another song-- a hiphop duet-- with Lance Bass.

It's times like this I consider rethinking my whole "No to TiVo" stance because I'd love to have some of these clips forever stored on a little digital box. I guess that's what Hulu is for now, though, right?

1 comment:

Jim said...

I wonder if something like this will pop up on America's Got Talent tomorrow nite. Maybe it will. Maybe it will.