Monday, July 19, 2010

The Hottie Awards: Sports Edition...

Let me preface this by saying I once brought a bunch of magazines to a baseball game. It was a friend's birthday party, but said friend is super into the game, and the team that was playing, so I knew talking would be a no-no. So I opted to arm myself with what would keep me occupied. After all, our seats were kind of far (and I didn't yet have prescription sunglasses), so boy-watching would have to be left to inside the pages instead of on the field. Needless to say, my scope of sports stars is also somewhat limited!

Top Ten Hotties of the Sports World...and what a strange and different world it is!

10. Blaine Wilson. I admit I have never seen him perform (play? what verb do you use when it's gymnastics?). But I found his photo on the Sports Illustrated website awhile back (probably when I was Googling photos of one of the top three on this list or something!) and fell in love immediately. I'm sure he's probably short in person (remember: gymnast) but everything else about him is damn near perfect!

9. Michael Phelps. He has a John Krasinski quality (maybe with a little Bryan Greenberg mixed in) but with a serious six-pack. Need I say more? Normally I'm all against Speedos, but he not only pulls them off: he actually makes them look acceptable!

8. Andre Ethier. Remember that baseball game I mentioned earlier? Yeah, well, if he had been on the team then I might not have needed the magazines! He has a bit more of a baby face than I usually go for but the kid looks like a winner all the way around so he has definitely caught my attention!

7. Jason Sehorn. He is a force to be reckoned with on the field (from what I hear), but he is the same at home, too. When I interviewed his wife, Angie Harmon, she told a story about how he will sit down in the little plastic chairs with his girls and play tea party, and that image alone was comical but heartwarming and endearing to me all at the same time. I always found him physically attractive, but hearing he has that sweetness (when usually you only hear about athletes cheating on their wives) clinched it.

6. Floyd Mayweather Jr. If Tyrese was an athlete, this would be him. That's enough said, no? Plus he's a boxer, and boxers have the best bodies! There, I said it. Even better than swimmers because some swimmers are still a bit too lean (read: thinner than me). Also, you know a boxer could punch out that swarmy Hollywood dude cruising you in the bar, and that kind of protection is kind of hot sometimes by itself!

5. Oscar De La Hoya. He's a boxer. Remember what I said just one number ago about them?? And somehow this dude has managed to keep from getting in the face enough, too, to still have perfectly chiseled cheekbones, a straight nose, and perfect white teeth for a smile worthy of sponsorship! Sports stars may be over the hill fairly young chronologically, but this guy only gets better with age!

4. Reggie Bush. When I was at USC, I took an entry-level Spanish language course that was known as the "easy" Spanish class because it was full of members of the football team. I somehow ended up in that class by accident. Reggie was enrolled but because he was already such an athletic star, he rarely showed up to class. Still, his name on the roster inspired me to actually turn up, which was a rarity in those days, just to get a glimpse at him!

3. Alex Rodriguez. Back when all of my friends in New York were falling in love with Derek Jeter (I think their teams played each other in a mid-nineties World Series, but honestly I couldn't be bothered to Google check that potential mis-memory), I found this guy who's eyes were bigger, brighter, and more beautiful. He may spend a lot of time in tabloids instead of MLB record-books but he has a good sense of humor about it. And he has that "caramel macchiato" thing going on that Tiffany Rinehart likes so much...and you know what? I think she may be onto something!

2. Kobe Bryant. You can say a lot of things about this guy. He's cocky; he's a bit of a jerk; he's "once a cheater, always a cheater." Whatever. The bottom line is, the guy can play ball. And when he takes the court that is all that should really matter. But what else matters-- at least to me-- is what he looks like while playing. His intensity and love for the game is hot; his arms in his jersey are hot; his smile when all suited up accepting awards is hot. He may be the reason I first started first started following the Lakers!

1. David Beckham. Someone once told me that he has barely taken the field since joining the L.A. Galaxy. I have no idea of knowing if that is just an exaggeration or not, but it doesn't matter. I would buy tickets just to stare at him sitting on the bench for an hour or an hour and a half or however long a soccer game lasts (More than an hour and a half??)!

A year ago, Tiger Woods would have made this list. But his behavior greatly outweighs his physical nature, in my mind, making him not worthy of any accolades, let alone one this small! And I can't believe I'm going to say this, but there are still about a half a dozen guys I can think of that I would have liked to put on this list (Pete Sampras, Cristiano Ronaldo, Derek Fisher, A.J. Wood...). Who knew I knew so many sports stars??

1 comment:

Jamie said...

OK, I'm sorry but Aaron Peirsol is a hotter swimmer than Michael Phelps. The face always counts!

And yay for Ethier! But Matt Kemp is my man!