Monday, November 21, 2011

In My Closet...

A friend of mine does a "Inside My [Insert Room Type Here]" blog post every once and awhile, highlighting products she can't live without. I'm not going to give you a peek inside my kitchen because you'd think I was an eight year-old who somehow conned her parents into going grocery shopping for the family, and I don't have any weird stuff tucked into the back of my nightstand drawers. If you read my book, you already know what I keep inside my Memory Box. And I don't want to completely copy the last post I saw of hers, which is inside her medicine cabinet. So instead, I've thrown open my bedroom closet (literally), to reveal to you all of the random things I tuck away, refusing to get rid of-- or get an actual storage unit for-- even if maybe I should.


Who hangs art in their closet? Apparently someone with OCD about what goes on her actual wall space. A few years ago, armed with the idea that I had to create a "Growing Up with 90s TV" canvas but assuming I couldn't afford to actually commission the Fazzino that I wanted, I set out to Kinko's to print a number of cast photos from my favorite childhood shows. Then I went to Michael's, bough the canvas and some paint, and got to work. What I create
d hung just outside my kitchen for a few months, until I realized I could get the (admittedly scaled down) version I really wanted. But I couldn't bring myself to throw this out. Especially because I worked myself into the canvas in a way I couldn't bring myself to ask Fazzino to do.
Two Rubbermaid storage boxes and an old Macy's shopping bag full of Christmas ornaments. I don't pack these well. Not nearly as well as I should, considering many of the items are hand-blown glass and extremely breakable. But it's all about condensing space in my small one-bedroom, so I wrap a sheet of tissue paper (or paper towel) or two around the non-plastics and put them, sometimes five deep, in boxes they didn't come in, bracing the boxes with stockings and Santa hats for extra cushioning. They're on the floor, so at least in an earthquake the only thing that will fall on them are jeans and cashmere sweaters, right?

Swag suitcase. Not just your ordinary, take a plane to wherever suitcase! No, for one thing, this is the Russian dolls of suitcases because inside it is a medium sized bag on wheels, and inside that is an even smaller bag on wheels, and inside that are mini piles of random items I have picked up at TCAs, leftover from giveaways, or just generally obtained from the pop culture realm but for which I have no real use and plan to auction off or donate later on. At any given time, you can find a handful of over-sized tee-shirts and maybe a cap or two (currently a Soft Kitty tee and Death Valley UTF Squad baseball cap, for example), a couple of TV on DVD I was sent to review (right now The Hour, Entourage, and the UK Office special edition), and other logo-stamped swag, like the Happy Endings massager, a 2 Broke Girls coin purse keychain, and blank notebooks from TNT, HBO, and Hallmark.

Friday Night Lights stadium blankets. In both Panthers and Lions colors for all your football loyalty needs! When NBC announced the release of a special "Complete Series" edition of FNL, I decided I just had to have it, even though I already owned all five seasons in their respective box sets. I justified the expense by saying that with the new collection, you also received a blanket for each team we fell in love with thanks to Coach Taylor. When they arrived, they were smaller and less fleece-y than expected, so I don't actually use them. In fact, I never even unrolled the Lions one yet.

A hatbox full of gift bags. Okay, this is weird for a lot of reasons. One, who has a hatbox in 2011? Or, who under the age of 5o has a hatbox at all? But when I bought a limited edition pair of Vinylmation Mickey ears at Disneyland this summer, it came in a box for safe-keeping, and I thought it might make a good storage box. And I was right. My father decided to clean out his own bedroom closets and came across a bunch of unused (or reusable) gift bags for a variety of holidays. He sent them to me. I saved them in order to save myself money when I have to give housewarming or birthday or Christmas gifts, but the thought of them rattling around loose in a drawer drove me nuts, so I stuffed them into a box where they'd be out of sight and taking up minimal space. Admittedly once I stuffed them in there I forgot I had them until I went digging around for this post...

My aloe socks! I couldn't find these when the weather first changed so I went and bought a new pair for this fall. But lo and behold, they had somehow fallen behind the Christmas decorations boxes, probably after getting stuck to a pair of pants after a trip in the dryer and accidentally getting hung up.

A fireproof box that should contain all of my important documents, like birth certificate, social security card, and passport, but instead holds jewelry cleaner, receipts for select high-ticket items in my apartment, my now-expired eyeglasses prescription, an extra iPhone/iPod charger, and a childhood journal. All my actually important papers are in a much safer, and less obvious, place. You may say this is my 'decoy' box.

A spider or two. I didn't actually see these, but I recently had an exterminator come in and do an assessment of my apartment. It was after a neighbor thought she had beg bugs, and I...got paranoid. He didn't find anything to be alarmed by, though he did say there was a spider or two burrowing under the carpet in my closet. I decided to not contract him to kill them, mostly because he said they're a good type of bug for killing others, like bedbugs, should I worry about infestation later.

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