Tell me if you think this is maturity-- or at least progress: my new TV crushes are guys that remind me of exes, instead of my new boyfriends being guys that remind me of TV crushes. It's at least a start, right? So on that note, I'd like to present to you my "New TV Boyfriends," a not-so complicated list of the TV characters I am finding increasingly attractive these days.
Jimmy Chance (Lucas Neff, Raising Hope) - I don't want to have my own kids, and let's face it, with my current financials I'm still not in a position where an adoption agency would take me seriously. But not only does Jimmy share my love of the Bayside Tigers (seriously, one of Greg Garcia's best decisions toward endearing that family to me was making them reference all of my other favorite shows!), he comes with a kid! And the absolute cutest kid I've ever seen on TV, to boot!
Tim Riggins (Taylor Kitsch, Friday Night Lights) - This almost shouldn't count as "new" but this is my list, and I'll make the rules however I want, dammit! He already kind of is my fake TV boyfriend in that I wear his Panthers sweatshirt and championship ring on a chain around my neck, and it's like I'm just waiting to get the call that his dream house in Dillon is finally built so I can pack up and move in with him already.
Wade Kinsella (Wilson Bethel, Hart of Dixie) - I've already waxed rambling about this. Just read this.
Prince Charming (Josh Dallas, Once Upon A Time) - Growing up, it was Prince Eric or bust for me when it came to the Disney canon, but Eddy Kitsis and Adam Horowitz have yet to introduce said character into their own fairy-tale (if and when they do, I have QUITE the list of casting suggestions!), and they have done such a good job of complicating Charming to the point where he's so much more than just a caricature, I have my hands-- and eyes-- full. I'd live in his castle and nurse him back to health and memory in Storybrooke. I don't really care which.
Mr. Reese (Jim Caviezel, Person of Interest) - He's tall, dark, handsome, and mysterious. He knows how to keep you safe and stay cool, calm, and collected while doing so, which would keep you cool, calm, and collected, too. He has already proven he's really good at following directions without asking too many Hows or Whys, and he has something of a tortured past which just makes him seem that much more mysterious without seeming too dangerous. With full disclosure, he also totally reminds me of a guy I was hung up on in high school. But less, uh, greasy.
Nathan Wuornos (Lucas Bryant, Haven) - There's something about his big puppy dog eyes and late-blooming desire to be able to feel that makes me want to hug him and never let him go. Maybe that makes me want to mother him more than anything, but well, I really want to steam him a cup of hot cocoa and stroke his hair off his forehead until he feels better about The Troubles.
Ted Vanderlay (Michael Mosley, Pan Am) - We can bond over our father issues together. And then he can fly me around in a seemingly private plane. Those Pan Am jets are cush-y! But really, he has a modern sensibility for his time, while I consider myself kind of old-fashioned for my own time. We can meet somewhere in the middle. And did I mention he's a pilot? I really do love all things all things aviation.
Chris Crary (Top Chef Texas) - Yes, I am aware that he is a very real person (he's a chef at the Viceroy Hotel here in Santa Monica) and not some figment of a scruffy writer's imagination. But I am including him anyway because physically he looks like the lost long paternal twin to the last guy I was seeing. It was a little eerie when I first saw him in the season premiere. I was all 'Are they letting amateur chefs on now ala Masterchef?' And 'Is this really where Mike has been when he told me he moved to New York!?' But no, they could just be long-lost siblings.